About Elle and Pressure-Free Living
━ ABOUT ELLE
Many a coach has told me that out of our mess comes our message. There were two messy times in my life that, as I reflect back, led me to the coaching I do today. The first happened in high school in Concord New Hampshire. Going into senior year of track season as our top 2-miler, after the first race, my knees buckled and I experienced sharp pains - nothing I’d known before. I’d damaged my patellas under my knee caps training in the wrong shoes and would need to take at least a year off of running to heal.
Not being with my team was devastating, so I asked to apprentice coach and soon, some of athletes started asking me for tips
to calm them down before events. I’d been performing as a violinist for years, and had some useful ways to help them perform well.
I used these techniques throughout my time at the University of Michigan where I earned three degrees: BMA, MM, MBA, and was a Branstrom Freshman Prize winner which was awarded at that time to 10 students with the highest GPAs. Since I couldn't run, I tried out for the rowing team and won a seat in the Varsity boat my freshman year -- my junior year we won silver at the Head of the Charles. I also became the first woman admitted to the graduate orchestral conducting program with Gustav Meier which gave me access to learning from many of the greatest conductors like Leonard Bernstein, Seiji Ozawa, and Daniel Barenboim in Ann Arbor, Salzburg, and Chicago.
The second messy moment happened at the University Michigan recital hall when, at age 25, for the first time ever, I experienced stage fright - I thought I was having a heart attack -- it was a panic attack.
That episode compelled me to go to Michigan’s Medical Library and research what had happened to me. (1987, so no internet!) From what I learned there, I developed specific ways to protect myself from releasing an abundance of stress hormones in key performance situations.
Coupling my original performance tools with the latest research on the stress response has resulted in the Pressure-Free Method. Throughout my career as a symphony executive, violinist, conductor, financial consultant to nonprofit executives, I thought of myself as a fairly calm, highly-trained professional with a “normal” amount of stress.” I honestly didn’t think I needed this method I was creating. I was wrong. It’s changed my life – healed me of chronic issues and upleveled my leadership -- as it’s done for so many of my clients.
If it weren't for my family, colleagues, and the mentors and coaches in my life, Pressure-Free Living might never have come to life. I've been married since 1988 to my husband Peter and we have three sons, Hugh, Ned, and William. They have experienced first-hand the power of less over-reaction and I have many mostly humorous stories of how this method has impacted us all. It's helped them to experience their potential in sports, art, and academics -- William was salutatorian of the class of 2022 at Columbia University. And it's brought many dreams to life -- Hugh and Ned founded their video production company Ingalls Pictures in 2015 in Grand Rapids, Michigan, which William joined after college and Pete serves as copywriter and interviewer.
At the Dartmouth track, clipboard in hand.
Conducting debut at Hill Auditorium, UM
William, me, Hugh, Pete, Ned
━ ABOUT PRESSURE-FREE LIVING
A different approach to living well.
For decades, I used simple ways that kept me calm under pressure to perform well on stage, in sports, academically, and in board rooms. But I still suffered from serious eczema on my hands, dense breast tissue, bouts of stress acne, and lots of colds each year.
Then in 2010, when my sons Hugh and Ned asked me to share these tips with their high school baseball team and the coach asked to work with my privately, I began assessing research from experts like Dr. Marianne Legato at Columbia University, Bruce McEwen at Rockefeller University, The Emotion and Regulation Stress Lab at Colorado State University, and other neuro-biologists. I thought about applying to complete a PhD and create a lab -- the person I would most want to study with is Dr. Ellen Langer at Harvard with whom whose work I feel aligned.
Instead, I kept reading and distilled what I was learning. I came to the conclusion that if we could prevent the release of excess stress hormones not just before the big events like I had been, but all day long, our minds and our bodies could work so much better for us. So I experimented on myself.
Within eight weeks, my hands cleared, my breast tissues changed, my skin healed. I've had only 5 small illnesses since 2010. I can think more clearly, work more productively, and have more patience.
Whether we are fairly calm or a hot mess of stress, we can elevate our health, our wealth, and our relationships with this simple method.
